Be quiet - the parents don't have to know

[inertia]

The New York Times, by Katie J. M. Baker (Denver Post 1/23/2023)

"Jessica Bradshaw found out that her 15-year-old identified as transgender after she glimpsed at a homework assignment with an unfamiliar name scrawled at the top. When she asked about the name, the teenager acknowledged that, at his request, teachers and administrators at his high school in Southern California had for six months been letting him use the boy's bathroom and calling him by male pronouns.

Bradshaw was confused: Didn't the school need her permission, or at least need to tell her?

It did not, a counselor later explained, because the student did not want his parents to know. District and state policies instructed the school to respect his wishes. 'There was never any word from anyone to let us know that on paper, and in the classroom, our daughter was our son', Bradshaw said.

The bradshaws have been startled to find themselves at odds with the school over their right to know about, and weigh in on, such a major development in their child's life - a dispute that illustrates how school districts, which have long been a battleground in cultural conflicts over gender and sexuality, are now facing wrenching new tensions over how to accommodate transgender children.

The bradshaws accepted their teenager's new gender identity, but not without trepidation, especially after he asked for hormones and surgery to remove his breasts. Doctors had previously diagnosed him as being on the autism spectrum, as well as with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, PTSD and anxiety. He had struggled with loneliness during the pandemic and to his parents, seemed not to know exactly who he was yet, because he and repeatedly changed his name and sexual orientation."

( the rest is behind a paywall ---> here ) Real Clear Politics provides the rest ----> here


_____

Notable:

"Other self-described liberal parents said they registered as independents or voted for Republican candidates for the first time as a result of this issue. Although they haven’t sued, some have retained lawyers affiliated with the largest legal organization on the religious right to battle their children’s schools."

This is another election issue where conservatives will likely have the upper hand. ( as they should )

 

[Michael R2]

The New York Times, by Katie J. M. Baker (Denver Post 1/23/2023)

"Jessica Bradshaw found out that her 15-year-old identified as transgender after she glimpsed at a homework assignment with an unfamiliar name scrawled at the top. When she asked about the name, the teenager acknowledged that, at his request, teachers and administrators at his high school in Southern California had for six months been letting him use the boy's bathroom and calling him by male pronouns.

Bradshaw was confused: Didn't the school need her permission, or at least need to tell her?

It did not, a counselor later explained, because the student did not want his parents to know. District and state policies instructed the school to respect his wishes. 'There was never any word from anyone to let us know that on paper, and in the classroom, our daughter was our son', Bradshaw said.

The bradshaws have been startled to find themselves at odds with the school over their right to know about, and weigh in on, such a major development in their child's life - a dispute that illustrates how school districts, which have long been a battleground in cultural conflicts over gender and sexuality, are now facing wrenching new tensions over how to accommodate transgender children.

The bradshaws accepted their teenager's new gender identity, but not without trepidation, especially after he asked for hormones and surgery to remove his breasts. Doctors had previously diagnosed him as being on the autism spectrum, as well as with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, PTSD and anxiety. He had struggled with loneliness during the pandemic and to his parents, seemed not to know exactly who he was yet, because he and repeatedly changed his name and sexual orientation."

( the rest is behind a paywall ---> here ) Real Clear Politics provides the rest ----> here


_____

I found this section to be telling:

The student, now 16, told The New York Times that his school had provided him with a space to be himself that he otherwise lacked. He had tried to come out to his parents before, he said, but they didn’t take it seriously, which is why he asked his school for support.

“I wish schools didn’t have to hide it from parents or do it without parental permission, but it can be important,” he said. “Schools are just trying to do what’s best to keep students safe and comfortable. When you’re trans, you feel like you are in danger all the time. Even though my parents were accepting, I was still scared, and that’s why the school didn’t tell them.”

It has to be such a difficult issue for anyone to deal with, especially with so many strident and, at times, hateful voices on both sides of the issue.

 

[mikeT]

I struggle with this issue specifically, because I've known two transgenders who didn't want their parents to know how they presented themselves to other people.

I think the school systems are trying to thread an extremely fine needle.

In the end, though, I think the parents probably deserve to know.

 

[inertia]

I found this section to be telling:

The student, now 16, told The New York Times that his school had provided him with a space to be himself that he otherwise lacked. He had tried to come out to his parents before, he said, but they didn’t take it seriously, which is why he asked his school for support.

“I wish schools didn’t have to hide it from parents or do it without parental permission, but it can be important,” he said. “Schools are just trying to do what’s best to keep students safe and comfortable. When you’re trans, you feel like you are in danger all the time. Even though my parents were accepting, I was still scared, and that’s why the school didn’t tell them.”

It has to be such a difficult issue for anyone to deal with, especially with so many strident and, at times, hateful voices on both sides of the issue.

When lawsuits and elections occur, conservatives will likely gain the upper hand over this issue. Many people are autistic and many more take care of them. Schools have exceeded their reach for power here.



____

 

[Michael R2]

I struggle with this issue specifically, because I've known two transgenders who didn't want their parents to know how they presented themselves to other people.

I think the school systems are trying to thread an extremely fine needle.

In the end, though, I think the parents probably deserve to know.

Agreed. But the decision to tell them must belong to the child.

 

[Michael R2]

When lawsuits and elections occur, conservatives will likely gain the upper hand over this issue. Many people are autistic and many more take care of them. Schools have exceeded their reach for power here.



____

I don't see this as a reach for power. What are they gaining?

 

[inertia]

I struggle with this issue specifically, because I've known two transgenders who didn't want their parents to know how they presented themselves to other people.

I think the school systems are trying to thread an extremely fine needle.

In the end, though, I think the parents probably deserve to know.

Even when autism is not a factor, teens are easily influenced as life's struggles by those that want money, sex, and control.

Parents must retain their traditional roles in order to protect teens. This process has worked for thousands of years, and this is an example where Government has crossed the proverbial line.

_____

 

[inertia]

I don't see this as a reach for power. What are they gaining?

control over the molding of children and instilling their own agenda of how people should behave in sexual matters

Lawyers are going to have a party over this

____

 

[BMS]

The school must contact the parents. There is no such thing as a transgender child, all studies showed 79-94% of chidlren who experienced dysphoria with their sex no longer did so after puberty. Schools do not have the medical or scientific expertise to deal.with gender dysphoria and the invariably associated mental health issues.
Schools should not allow the gender identity lie to influence children and this school, like many, schould be prosecuted and shut down

 

[Michael R2]

control over the molding of children and instilling their own agenda of how people should behave in sexual matters

The student approached the school about the issue. There is no hint of any agenda by the school in this story.

Lawyers are going to have a party over this

____

I'm sure. This is what I was talking about in my initial response. Both sides are going to scream and holler about what "must be" happening rather than discussing what is actually happening. And the kids get caught in the middle.

 

[Temujin]

The New York Times, by Katie J. M. Baker (Denver Post 1/23/2023)

"Jessica Bradshaw found out that her 15-year-old identified as transgender after she glimpsed at a homework assignment with an unfamiliar name scrawled at the top. When she asked about the name, the teenager acknowledged that, at his request, teachers and administrators at his high school in Southern California had for six months been letting him use the boy's bathroom and calling him by male pronouns.

Bradshaw was confused: Didn't the school need her permission, or at least need to tell her?

It did not, a counselor later explained, because the student did not want his parents to know. District and state policies instructed the school to respect his wishes. 'There was never any word from anyone to let us know that on paper, and in the classroom, our daughter was our son', Bradshaw said.

The bradshaws have been startled to find themselves at odds with the school over their right to know about, and weigh in on, such a major development in their child's life - a dispute that illustrates how school districts, which have long been a battleground in cultural conflicts over gender and sexuality, are now facing wrenching new tensions over how to accommodate transgender children.

The bradshaws accepted their teenager's new gender identity, but not without trepidation, especially after he asked for hormones and surgery to remove his breasts. Doctors had previously diagnosed him as being on the autism spectrum, as well as with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, PTSD and anxiety. He had struggled with loneliness during the pandemic and to his parents, seemed not to know exactly who he was yet, because he and repeatedly changed his name and sexual orientation."

( the rest is behind a paywall ---> here ) Real Clear Politics provides the rest ----> here


_____

Notable:

"Other self-described liberal parents said they registered as independents or voted for Republican candidates for the first time as a result of this issue. Although they haven’t sued, some have retained lawyers affiliated with the largest legal organization on the religious right to battle their children’s schools."

This is another election issue where conservatives will likely have the upper hand. ( as they should )

The issue here is surely nothing to do with the power of schools, or indeed with transgender. The question is, at what point in a person's life are they entitled to make private decisions about their lives? A teenager who has competence to make decisions over disease treatment, pregnancy and abortion, whether or not to join the army, their sexuality etc. is entitled to make those decisions privately. Any person, be they doctor, priest or teacher, who breaks a confidence, is liable for damage to the student. I would expect the school to give very strong advice that parents should be informed, but if the student is adamant, then the school's hands are tied. Assuming that the student has competence. Presumably there's a presumptive age limit on a parent's right to be involved. If not, there should be.

 

[Crazy Ivan]

The issue here is surely nothing to do with the power of schools, or indeed with transgender. The question is, at what point in a person's life are they entitled to make private decisions about their lives? A teenager who has competence to make decisions over disease treatment, pregnancy and abortion, whether or not to join the army, their sexuality etc. is entitled to make those decisions privately. Any person, be they doctor, priest or teacher, who breaks a confidence, is liable for damage to the student. I would expect the school to give very strong advice that parents should be informed, but if the student is adamant, then the school's hands are tied. Assuming that the student has competence. Presumably there's a presumptive age limit on a parent's right to be involved. If not, there should be.

Well, in the US, a child (a 15 year old qualifies) is not considered by law to be mature enough even to have sex. They can't get a tooth removed without permission from a parent or guardian. 15 year olds can't vote and in the vast majority of states can't get a driver's license. They aren't considered to be old enough to make these kinds of decisions for themselves. Anyone who thinks they are not mature enough to do these things but are mature enough to choose - without parents' permission - to transition to the opposite gender needs to have their heads examined.

 

[Temujin]

Well, in the US, a child (a 15 year old qualifies) is not considered by law to be mature enough even to have sex. They can't get a tooth removed without permission from a parent or guardian. 15 year olds can't vote and in the vast majority of states can't get a driver's license. They aren't considered to be old enough to make these kinds of decisions for themselves. Anyone who thinks they are not mature enough to do these things but are mature enough to choose - without parents' permission - to transition to the opposite gender needs to have their heads examined.

Can they make decisions regarding medical treatment, insisting on a blood transfusion against parents wishes, for example? Or refusing aggressive cancer treatment and opting for palliative care instead? I'm not disagreeing with you. I just want to get a sense of the law in the US.

The current controversy in the UK concerns Scotland, which has reduced the age at which a person can unilaterally decide on transgender issues, from 18 to 16. A decision which has been blocked by the UK parliament and will be decided in the courts.

 

[CrowCross]

for six months been letting him use the boy's bathroom and calling him by male pronouns.

Here lies a problem....especially when you have 50 or so in a school.

 

[Thistle]

I struggle with this issue specifically, because I've known two transgenders who didn't want their parents to know how they presented themselves to other people.

I think the school systems are trying to thread an extremely fine needle.

In the end, though, I think the parents probably deserve to know.

The school districts have no business injecting themselves into this issue with any children ever under any circumstances period. And every single school official or employee who engages, assists or facilitates this Cabal to destroy young lives should be imprisoned and not released until such time as they are no longer a dire threat to the community.

 

[CrowCross]

Well, in the US, a child (a 15 year old qualifies) is not considered by law to be mature enough even to have sex. They can't get a tooth removed without permission from a parent or guardian. 15 year olds can't vote and in the vast majority of states can't get a driver's license. They aren't considered to be old enough to make these kinds of decisions for themselves. Anyone who thinks they are not mature enough to do these things but are mature enough to choose - without parents' permission - to transition to the opposite gender needs to have their heads examined.

I agree. "They aren't considered to be old enough to make these kinds of decisions for themselves."...especially when... "Doctors had previously diagnosed him as being on the autism spectrum, as well as with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, PTSD and anxiety."

 

[Temujin]

Here lies a problem....especially when you have 50 or so in a school.

Why is this a problem? I get the feeling that bathrooms in the US, (what we call toilets) are hot beds of vice and depravity, rather than somewhere one goes to urinate or defecate. Why is a trans male using boys bathrooms more hazardous than a homosexual male doing the same?

 

[Thistle]

Why is this a problem? I get the feeling that bathrooms in the US, (what we call toilets) are hot beds of vice and depravity, rather than somewhere one goes to urinate or defecate. Why is a trans male using boys bathrooms more hazardous than a homosexual male doing the same?

Because young girls come home and report to their parents how they've been raped in the bathrooms. When their parents go to school board meetings to complain, they are attacked by mobs of police officers beaten and ejected from the school board meetings. Now that may not be a problem for you but here in the United States we consider that to be a problem.

 

[Crazy Ivan]

Can they make decisions regarding medical treatment, insisting on a blood transfusion against parents wishes, for example? Or refusing aggressive cancer treatment and opting for palliative care instead? I'm not disagreeing with you. I just want to get a sense of the law in the US.

The current controversy in the UK concerns Scotland, which has reduced the age at which a person can unilaterally decide on transgender issues, from 18 to 16. A decision which has been blocked by the UK parliament and will be decided in the courts.

The only medical things that teens can do without parental permission are (1) get an abortion, and (2) undergo gender transition.

Go figure.

 

[CrowCross]

Why is this a problem? I get the feeling that bathrooms in the US, (what we call toilets) are hot beds of vice and depravity, rather than somewhere one goes to urinate or defecate. Why is a trans male using boys bathrooms more hazardous than a homosexual male doing the same?

Because there is also "trans" girls...