The Bible and Divorce

Truth_Faith2020

New Member
I was just reading a post on CARM regarding divorce and wanted clarification on something. I understand the post was just opinions although based on scripture. It mentioned that if you are a believer and initiated the divorce, you are not able to remarry? I couldnt work out if that relates to my situation (I am nowhere near wanting to remarry... this is just a question!)

I am a believer and my soon to be ex husband is an atheist. It was his decision to leave me and not accept any attempt at reconciliation, however I am the one to have petitioned for divorce?

Thoughts?
 

Challenger007

New Member
I think everyone has a right to happiness. Not everyone succeeds in building their own happiness the first time. And it seems to me that if a divorce happened, this does not mean that you need to go to the grave almost alive, depriving yourself of the joys of family life. After all, a year or 5 years may pass and you may meet a person in whom you will see support and consolation. Would you give up real happiness in favor of stereotypes? Faith is good. But there must be common sense. We are created to live fully. That is why we are the most intellectually advanced beings on the planet. You should not put on the shackles of medieval stereotypes to please anyone. We are often dependent on other people's opinions and this does not make our life happy.
 

Kris Jordan

Member
I was just reading a post on CARM regarding divorce and wanted clarification on something. I understand the post was just opinions although based on scripture. It mentioned that if you are a believer and initiated the divorce, you are not able to remarry? I couldnt work out if that relates to my situation (I am nowhere near wanting to remarry... this is just a question!)

I am a believer and my soon to be ex husband is an atheist. It was his decision to leave me and not accept any attempt at reconciliation, however I am the one to have petitioned for divorce?

Thoughts?
Hi Truth_Faith2020,

The Bible provides two “allowances” for divorce: abandonment by an unsaved spouse and adultery. In such cases, divorce is not commanded or required by God. He simply permits it when all attempts to reconcile fail. Outside of these two specific situations, no other biblical provisions are given for a divorce.

In your case, if you are married to an unbeliever and he abandoned you, then, according to Scripture, you are free to divorce. It is irrelevant who "files" for the divorce. The marriage is over, due to his abandonment of you. The papers are simply a legal formality that must be filed and approved by a judge.

  • 1 Corinthians 7:12-15 (NASB) -- But to the rest I say, not the Lord, that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he must not divorce her. And a woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he consents to live with her, she must not send her husband away. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband; for otherwise your children are unclean, but now they are holy. Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace.
 

Beloved Daughter

Well-known member
Hi Truth_Faith2020,

The Bible provides two “allowances” for divorce: abandonment by an unsaved spouse and adultery. In such cases, divorce is not commanded or required by God. He simply permits it when all attempts to reconcile fail. Outside of these two specific situations, no other biblical provisions are given for a divorce.

In your case, if you are married to an unbeliever and he abandoned you, then, according to Scripture, you are free to divorce. It is irrelevant who "files" for the divorce. The marriage is over, due to his abandonment of you. The papers are simply a legal formality that must be filed and approved by a judge.

  • 1 Corinthians 7:12-15 (NASB) -- But to the rest I say, not the Lord, that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he must not divorce her. And a woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he consents to live with her, she must not send her husband away. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband; for otherwise your children are unclean, but now they are holy. Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace.

Beautifully stated Kris!
 

Buzzard

Active member
Is.50:1
Thus saith the Lord,
Where is the bill of your mother's divorcement, whom I have put away?
or which of my creditors is it to whom I have sold you?
Behold, for your iniquities have ye sold yourselves,
and for your transgressions is your mother put away.


Matt.5:31
It hath been said,
Whosoever shall put away his wife,
let him give her a writing of divorcement
:

32 But I say unto you,
That whosoever shall put away his wife,
saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery:
and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery
.

Matt.19:7

They say unto him,
Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement,
and to put her away?

8 He saith unto them,
Moses because of the
hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives:
but from the beginning it was not so
.

9 And I say unto you,
Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another,
committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery
.

10 His disciples say unto him,
If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry.

11 But he said unto them,
All men cannot receive this saying,
save they to whom it is given
.

12 For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb:
and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men:
and there be eunuchs, which have
made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake.
He wasn't talking about self castration, gentlemen

He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.

what is the commandment about a wife that was put away
even for Adultery; Physical or Spiritual
that wishes to return ????

Gentlemen;
you need to start listening to the True Teaches,
and not these know nuttin Protestant Preachers
That twist the words of Paul

But he said unto them,
All men cannot receive this saying,
save they to whom it is given
.

He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.
 

SteveB

Well-known member
I was just reading a post on CARM regarding divorce and wanted clarification on something. I understand the post was just opinions although based on scripture. It mentioned that if you are a believer and initiated the divorce, you are not able to remarry? I couldnt work out if that relates to my situation (I am nowhere near wanting to remarry... this is just a question!)

I am a believer and my soon to be ex husband is an atheist. It was his decision to leave me and not accept any attempt at reconciliation, however I am the one to have petitioned for divorce?

Thoughts?
Please read 1 Corinthians 7.

10 Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. 11 But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.​
12 But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. 13 And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. 15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. 16 For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?​


If your husband is the one leaving, God has called you to be at peace with God. You're not in trouble with God, because of their departure.
 
C

Chuckz

Guest
True Faith,

I would be careful about asking for help on the internet. I was having lunch at a restaurant with friends with a woman going for her master's in Christian counseling at a Biblical University. She said that people can do tremendous damage doing counselling and I believe her.

I bought one of the school's books from a professor and he said the Catholic Church (as an example and I am not Catholic) will spend a billion dollars in payouts to people from counselling. The people we try to help are also the ones that sue us and a jury will often side with the victim.

I've called up churches asking for advice and they were caring and gave me answers but I wouldn't take all of the advice they gave me today. Part of that is because I know too much and I'm learning new things every day. I'm developing my theology every day and I'm still learning that I should have done this and I should have done that but I can't go back and fix everything. I can post this and then the Lord may bring verses to my memory that I can't hear right now because I'm focused on you instead of the Lord right now. When I have quiet and walk around quietly, a lot of verses can come to my mind.

New International Version
Not many of you should become teachers, my fellow believers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly.

We can't predict human behavior and a different psychologist answered me and said there is no "why" behind people doing things.

One of the things we can do is pray and wait on God. We don't know if they will eventually come to know the Lord Jesus Christ.

New International Version
But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.

I tell people this verse and their wrong response is, "Well, you must not have a good marriage" but that is not what the Bible says. We all probably face troubles and some more than others won't admit it.

I'm not saying to not go for help.

Chuck
 
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