The Bible and Divorce

CharismaticLady

Well-known member
IOW, unlike your ex-husband, you have not committed adultery if you have remained celibate.

And I hope you are healed and I wish you well.
Correct. I don't date at all. And I wear a wedding ring. But now I consider God as my husband.

Isaiah 54:5
For thy Maker is thine husband; the Lord of hosts is his name; and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God of the whole earth shall he be called.
 

CharismaticLady

Well-known member
I'm simply pointing out the hypocrisy of those who falsely claim they are (Matt 7:3-5, 7:21-23 Luke 13:29-30).
I agree. Not everyone who calls Jesus, Lord will be in heaven. Matthew 7:21-23. If the reason you are not a Christian is because you are looking at people, you are looking in the wrong place. Study Jesus, and Him only.
 

J regia

Well-known member
I agree. Not everyone who calls Jesus, Lord will be in heaven. Matthew 7:21-23. If the reason you are not a Christian is because you are looking at people, you are looking in the wrong place. Study Jesus, and Him only.
“I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

 

Alanhey

New Member
Why don't you want to get married again? Many people become depressed and lonely. First, you should dig into yourself and understand why doesn't want to get married. If you can't understand this then you need to read about this at https://breakupangels.com/couples-back-together-breakup/. Thanks to them, I could to sort out my feelings. I was also could to understand why I had conflicts with my husband. In short, you shouldn't be afraid to ask for help to solve these problems. We are all human beings, and we all need help.
 

Slyzr

Well-known member
I was just reading a post on CARM regarding divorce and wanted clarification on something. I understand the post was just opinions although based on scripture. It mentioned that if you are a believer and initiated the divorce, you are not able to remarry? I couldnt work out if that relates to my situation (I am nowhere near wanting to remarry... this is just a question!)

I am a believer and my soon to be ex husband is an atheist. It was his decision to leave me and not accept any attempt at reconciliation, however I am the one to have petitioned for divorce?

Thoughts?

basically ......

As an unbeliever, he has the right to not accept your religion.

For he was born already.

Children?
 

BMS

Well-known member
In Matt 19 and Mark 10 Jesus is challenged about divorce and He quotes the Genesis creation accounts. Of course when God says let 'us' make mankind in 'our' image, male and female, the us and our includes Jesus (In the beginning was the Word..)
So the image of God is a man and a woman, and the reason Jesus says is so that a man shall be united with his wife and the two shall become one flesh.
That is why Jesus speaks against divorce because it breaks the image of God. It would also be with for example domestic abuse, that would be abuse against the image of God. And of course a man and a man coupling isnt even the image of God or the purpose of God.

But many Christians cite the sermon on the mount as wonderful teaching of Jesus, such as blessed are the poor, but the sermon is from the time He went up on the mount to the time He came down, ie Matt 5-7 and in that time He teaches do not divorce.

Very difficult for those who come to Christ and have divorced because society or even some churches see no problem with it, because the union has already been broken. Thankfully Jesus is about the forgiveness for sin and the renewing of one's mind in Him.
Potentially disastrous news for church leadership that condones it though.
 

BMS

Well-known member
“I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

But he didn't like Christ. If he had liked Christ he would have focused on Christ and not the Christians Christ saves.
 

cjab

Active member
Unbound is the same as death. Two Christians divorcing is still bound.

My Christian husband divorced me to marry the wife of his best friend. They caused two divorces, but for me I am still bound and after 20 years, he is still the last may I kissed. I WILL NOT sin.
He couldn't have been a Christian then: more likely a charlatan Christian.
 

CharismaticLady

Well-known member
He couldn't have been a Christian then: more likely a charlatan Christian.
I find it interesting, but a little unnerving, that both Jesus in Mt. 19, and Paul in 1 Cor. 7 have different rules for women, than for men. Did you ever notice that?

39 A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 1 Cor. 7
 

cjab

Active member
I find it interesting, but a little unnerving, that both Jesus in Mt. 19, and Paul in 1 Cor. 7 have different rules for women, than for men. Did you ever notice that?
I doubt I can add anything to what you already know but I will have a go.

In Matt and Mark, Jesus was transitioning the law into a more spiritual phase. In the past "adultery" by the man against the wife by divorce (Mark 10:11) had been allowed because men's hearts were hard. Jesus said of his new teaching respecting divorce by man, "All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it." Mat 19:11.

So the law of divorce under the spiritual regime is similar for men and women Mark 10:11,12.

In the case of adultery with another man's current wife the sin is more serious: Deu 22:22. The adulterer commits a criminal offence under the law of Moses. It would mandate excommunication from any "church of God." If he is admitted to a church, it would not be by a church "of God." Not every church is Christian. A church that admits unrepentant adulterers is not a Christian church.

39 A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 1 Cor. 7
I think this is not referring to the situation where the marriage has been repudiated by the heathen husband, not only because the "husband" is no longer "her" husband but someone else's, but because the heathen has no interest in reconciliation or in repentance. The unbinding has occured in respect of the heathen, by token of his heathenism. I think this is a practical teaching. Note 1 Cor 7:15 "If the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is NOT BOUND in such circumstances;"

Mat 5:32 is relevant in the theocracy, and to believers. Jesus acknowledges that a woman divorced will (eventually) "commit adultery" as will the man who marries her, but that the adultery is caused by the divorcing party. This means that the divorcing party bears the responsibility for the guilt of the adultery of the divorced person and their spouse in a theocracy. Yet what does Jesus mean by "adultery" in respect of a heathen repudiating a marriage? Marriage is only for believers. It has no application to heathens. Marriage itself is a theocratic institution.

And "theocracy" is the context here. Matt 5:32 is relevant to rthe theocracy of Israel (i.e believers in the church). It is a theocratic law he has set in place, i.e intended for those living under the theocracy. Jesus was angling for reconciliation in the theocracy and condemning as adulterers anyone who hindered reconciliation by marrying a divorced woman, or a woman who hindered reconciliation by getting re-married. This teaching is reflected in 1 Cor 7:10,11.

Whereas Paul then considers the issue in terms of the divorcing party not being part of the theocracy (the church). 1 Cor 7 is talking about heathens who renounce marriage. That is different. Heathens are nasty people, and to be treated differently. As before 1 Cor 7:15 applies. As for you, you said:

"My Christian husband divorced me to marry the wife of his best friend. They caused two divorces, but for me I am still bound and after 20 years, he is still the last may I kissed. I WILL NOT sin."

As I have said above, your husband is not a Christian, because he committed adultery with another man's wife. He is a heathen. 1 Cor 7:15 applies. You are NOT BOUND and you will not sin by getting remarried.
 
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Fenuay

Well-known member
Hi Truth_Faith2020,

The Bible provides two “allowances” for divorce: abandonment by an unsaved spouse and adultery. In such cases, divorce is not commanded or required by God. He simply permits it when all attempts to reconcile fail. Outside of these two specific situations, no other biblical provisions are given for a divorce.

In your case, if you are married to an unbeliever and he abandoned you, then, according to Scripture, you are free to divorce. It is irrelevant who "files" for the divorce. The marriage is over, due to his abandonment of you. The papers are simply a legal formality that must be filed and approved by a judge.

  • 1 Corinthians 7:12-15 (NASB) -- But to the rest I say, not the Lord, that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he must not divorce her. And a woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he consents to live with her, she must not send her husband away. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband; for otherwise your children are unclean, but now they are holy. Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace.
I just came across this and I was in a very similar situation! This is such a wonderful and comforting answer. Thank you for this! 🥰🥰
 

Fenuay

Well-known member
So what!!! That's irrelevant to me since I'm not a Christian, and only Christians sin.

But do you believe that Jesus and what he said is irrelevant, given he condemned ALL remarried divorcees to hell (Matt 5:27-30 Mark 10:11-12 Luke 16:18 Exodus 20:14)?
So nice of you to choose to refute Christianity by telling a woman who is hurting right now that she is going to hell. Does it make you feel good to hurt others?
 

Bob Carabbio

Well-known member
I was just reading a post on CARM regarding divorce and wanted clarification on something. I understand the post was just opinions although based on scripture. It mentioned that if you are a believer and initiated the divorce, you are not able to remarry? I couldnt work out if that relates to my situation (I am nowhere near wanting to remarry... this is just a question!)

I am a believer and my soon to be ex husband is an atheist. It was his decision to leave me and not accept any attempt at reconciliation, however I am the one to have petitioned for divorce?

Thoughts?
It's IMPOSSIBLE for a married couple to be divorced and there not be SIN INVOLVED in the lives of both persons involved. Probably more sin on one hand than the other, but SIN nonetheless. HOWEVER - for Christians, sin confessed and repented of, is SIN cleansed. Divorce isn't a SUPER SIN. It's just SIN.

ANd then there's: 1Co 7:27
Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not to be loosed. Art thou loosed (lyo - Divorced) from a wife? seek not a wife.
28 But and if thou marry, thou hast not sinned; and if a virgin marry, she hath not sinned. Nevertheless such shall have trouble in the flesh: but I spare you.

The context, of course is the ADVANTAGE of being single in threatening times, but Paul states right out that it IS NOT SIN for a divorced person to re-marry.
 

CharismaticLady

Well-known member
I doubt I can add anything to what you already know but I will have a go.

In Matt and Mark, Jesus was transitioning the law into a more spiritual phase. In the past "adultery" by the man against the wife by divorce (Mark 10:11) had been allowed because men's hearts were hard. Jesus said of his new teaching respecting divorce by man, "All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it." Mat 19:11.

So the law of divorce under the spiritual regime is similar for men and women Mark 10:11,12.

In the case of adultery with another man's current wife the sin is more serious: Deu 22:22. The adulterer commits a criminal offence under the law of Moses. It would mandate excommunication from any "church of God." If he is admitted to a church, it would not be by a church "of God." Not every church is Christian. A church that admits unrepentant adulterers is not a Christian church.


I think this is not referring to the situation where the marriage has been repudiated by the heathen husband, not only because the "husband" is no longer "her" husband but someone else's, but because the heathen has no interest in reconciliation or in repentance. The unbinding has occured in respect of the heathen, by token of his heathenism. I think this is a practical teaching. Note 1 Cor 7:15 "If the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is NOT BOUND in such circumstances;"

Mat 5:32 is relevant in the theocracy, and to believers. Jesus acknowledges that a woman divorced will (eventually) "commit adultery" as will the man who marries her, but that the adultery is caused by the divorcing party. This means that the divorcing party bears the responsibility for the guilt of the adultery of the divorced person and their spouse in a theocracy. Yet what does Jesus mean by "adultery" in respect of a heathen repudiating a marriage? Marriage is only for believers. It has no application to heathens. Marriage itself is a theocratic institution.

And "theocracy" is the context here. Matt 5:32 is relevant to rthe theocracy of Israel (i.e believers in the church). It is a theocratic law he has set in place, i.e intended for those living under the theocracy. Jesus was angling for reconciliation in the theocracy and condemning as adulterers anyone who hindered reconciliation by marrying a divorced woman, or a woman who hindered reconciliation by getting re-married. This teaching is reflected in 1 Cor 7:10,11.

Whereas Paul then considers the issue in terms of the divorcing party not being part of the theocracy (the church). 1 Cor 7 is talking about heathens who renounce marriage. That is different. Heathens are nasty people, and to be treated differently. As before 1 Cor 7:15 applies. As for you, you said:

"My Christian husband divorced me to marry the wife of his best friend. They caused two divorces, but for me I am still bound and after 20 years, he is still the last may I kissed. I WILL NOT sin."

As I have said above, your husband is not a Christian, because he committed adultery with another man's wife. He is a heathen. 1 Cor 7:15 applies. You are NOT BOUND and you will not sin by getting remarried.

Well, it takes two to tango, and God hasn't brought me anyone anyway. I'm content being alone.
 
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