Hi everyone, sorry I've been going through the ringer lately. On some days I feel doomed, as if I never had a choice. Then people tell me, "you're complaining isn't going to help." But I'm not complaining, I'm stating a fact, I did not ask to be born, so who's to decide if I want to continue living? Do we not have the death penalty? What makes me any different from Ted Bundy? Besides the fact I'm not a serial killer. The only difference really he didn't get a choice and was given death as a penalty. Those who are sick, seek death so they wouldn't have to suffer the pain. They want to go out with dignity. Would you want to go through the pain of a terminal illness all the way to the point of passing? Or would you rather put your trust in God knowing that you're ready to go home to him? I'm sure intention has a lot to do with eternity. Certainly a soldier who jumps on top of a grenade so he can save his platoon, isn't going to be treat the same as Jihad's believing 70 virgins await them.
Just a conversation I wanted to have. I like seeing different perspectives.
Thank you to everyone whos prayed for me and taken the time to check up on me.
I thought I knew Christ when I was preaching His Gospel to many... but I'm afraid I lead them down an even worser fate.
I live with this guilt. I tell myself that God has to understand I was brainwashed by a cult. But then it just confusing and even more ugly as I think about it.
#recovering #postculttrauma
God bless
There is nothing to be sorry about. We should always be in prayer for each other.
“Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed” (James 5:16).
“Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ” (Gal. 6:2).
The good news is that if you were truly saved you can’t lose your salvation.
“if we are faithless, He remains faithful, for He cannot deny Himself (2 Ti. 2:13).
“Everyone the Father gives Me will come to Me, and the one who comes to Me I will never drive away” (John 6:37).
You need to pray and ask Jesus for confirmation of your salvation. Do you ever pray and seek Him? Do you read the bible?
“Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of Christ” (Ro. 10:17).
Remember this is not only a spiritual battle against powers and principalities, but a battle of the body of flesh we still live in as opposed to the spiritual body (Holy Spirit) we are all joined in by salvation in Christ.
When we are saved we trust that through Jesus our flesh is crucified with Jesus and we become partakers of His sinless risen body.
“those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires” (Gal. 5:24).
However, the old sin nature still testifies from the dead blood of the flesh.
“And the LORD said, “What have you done? The voice of your brother’s blood is crying to me from the ground” (Gen. 4:10).
Jesus wasn’t risen yet so it wasn’t His blood crying out.
In contrast, when one is saved they are washed in the pure blood of Jesus, and the living waters of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit, pure blood of Jesus, and living water testify of the truth.
“So Jesus said to them, “Truly, truly, I tell you, unless you eat the flesh and drink the blood of the Son of Man, you have no life in you.
54Whoever eats My flesh and drinks My blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day.
55For My flesh is real food, and My blood is real drink.
56Whoever eats My flesh and drinks My blood remains in Me, and I in him.
57Just as the living Father sent Me and I live because of the Father, so also the one who feeds on Me will live because of Me.
58This is the bread that came down from heaven. Unlike your fathers, who ate the manna and died, the one who eats this bread will live forever” (Jn 6:53-58).
“5Who then overcomes the world? Only he who believes that Jesus is the Son of God. 6This is the One who came by water and blood, Jesus Christ—not by water alone, but by water and blood. And it is the Spirit who testifies to this, because the Spirit is the truth. 7For there are three that testify:b 8the Spirit, the water, and the blood—and these three are in agreement” (1 Jn. 5:7-8).
“And this is that testimony: God has given us eternal life, and this life is in His Son. 12Whoever has the Son has life; whoever does not have the Son of God does not have life” (1 Jn. 5:11-12).
“He saved us, not by the righteous deeds we had done, but according to His mercy, through the washing of new birth and renewal by the Holy Spirit” (Titus 3:5).
It is not about analyzing yourself. If you are at the time believing the testimony of the dead blood because you still are in your earthly tent, you will continue to go through the ringer. Dead blood does not give spiritual life but tries to get you to believe in sin and death. However, if you by faith (not feelings) trust in the truth of the true God of the bible, you will walk in the Spirit and be free of the agony.
Sinful impulses come from the flesh and deception from the dead blood and from evil powers…
“For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places” (Eph. 6:12).
“For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world” (1 Jn. 2:16).
And the only way to overcome is by prayer, reading the bible, by faith believing the truth, coupled with desire to change and effort.
“We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ” (2 Co. 10:5).
And don’t trust opinion over God’s Word.
