At 18 I was diagnosed with atrial fibrillation. When I was 35, I was diagnosed with congestive heart failure. Fifteen years later the side effects from Big Pharma's pills were taking their toll so I asked my cardiologist what my options were. He strongly recommended that I stay on at least two of the eight medications he had started me on fifteen years earlier. He then said, "Anything that can cause your heart to fibrillate can stop your heart instantly. You'll be dead before you hit the ground." He then followed that up with this, "You can't just live the rest of your life as a hermit." He said this because the most common problem I was having was with secondhand smoke setting my heart into spasms and fibrillating uncontrollably.
The most notable side effects to reveal themselves early on were intense sensitivity to the sun, damage not just to my eyes, but to my vision as well, choking in the middle of the night, insomnia (which eventually became chronic), irritability and confusion (probably as a direct result of the chronic insomnia), digestive distress, etc.
If I could get to sleep, I would almost invariably wake up in a state of complete confusion. I not only didn't know where I was, I didn't know who or even what I was. These states eventually bled into my normal waking consciousness until I would find myself in these states of total detachment from my body and my immediate surroundings. I would completely lose touch with my identity. It would just dissolve as if "I" was never really there to begin with.
As absurd as this may sound, this was a welcome relief from the misery I was going through almost constantly. Whenever I had some reason why I would have to venture out into society, I had to be on constant alert for anyone who may be smoking or may be getting ready to light up a cigarette. I have to be constantly aware of which way the wind is blowing and always keeping an eye on anyone with a cigarette who may be upwind from me. Then there's the rest of the time when I'm in complete isolation; eight years now, and counting...
Smokers love to loiter or congregate around entrances to buildings, probably because that's where businesses, apartments, resorts, etc. place their ash trays. Why can't they place them 100' away from the entrances?
This is my problem, but I'm getting fed up with the fact that I'm dealing with an issue that is an existential threat to my life. I'm not in danger of being infected by someone with a contagious virus that may or may not make me sick or kill me. I'm in danger of immediate DEATH! I'm not being forced to drive to another state to exercise some form of bodily autonomy. That option doesn't exist for me at all. I'm not bothered by someone getting my name wrong, or using the wrong pronoun, or discriminating against me. I don't really have an identity that can be offended anymore.
It's like I'm invisible to the world. Nobody sees me. I'm effectively already dead, but the dead have this way of intruding into the world of the living sometimes, and I'm about to go Medieval on this whole God-forsaken world. I may be on the verge of making it everyone else's problem.
I've politely asked people not to smoke near the entrances of buildings only to be summarily disregarded, smirked or laughed at. Perhaps one of those Super Soaker water cannons might be the remedy I'm looking for. This one looks good:
http://www.isoaker.com/Armoury/Analysis/1998/super_soaker_cps3000.php
Smoking never used to bother me, and I've never been one to tell people how they should live their lives, but I may actually be the only one in over seven billion people on this planet that have this problem so perhaps I may need to enlist the help of people who just simply don't like smokers. Perhaps they may just need to know that there is actually one person on this planet that is at risk of immediate death to secondhand smoke to motivate them to go on the offensive.
I realize that soaking a smoker with a water cannon may result in retaliation, perhaps even sever bodily harm. A Super Soaker 3000 isn't a threat to anyone's life, nor is it even likely to do physical harm to anyone. Therefore, if they approach me with intent to do bodily harm, I am probably well within my rights to defend myself with pepper spray, mace, and/or a taser if necessary.
Who's with me?
The most notable side effects to reveal themselves early on were intense sensitivity to the sun, damage not just to my eyes, but to my vision as well, choking in the middle of the night, insomnia (which eventually became chronic), irritability and confusion (probably as a direct result of the chronic insomnia), digestive distress, etc.
If I could get to sleep, I would almost invariably wake up in a state of complete confusion. I not only didn't know where I was, I didn't know who or even what I was. These states eventually bled into my normal waking consciousness until I would find myself in these states of total detachment from my body and my immediate surroundings. I would completely lose touch with my identity. It would just dissolve as if "I" was never really there to begin with.
As absurd as this may sound, this was a welcome relief from the misery I was going through almost constantly. Whenever I had some reason why I would have to venture out into society, I had to be on constant alert for anyone who may be smoking or may be getting ready to light up a cigarette. I have to be constantly aware of which way the wind is blowing and always keeping an eye on anyone with a cigarette who may be upwind from me. Then there's the rest of the time when I'm in complete isolation; eight years now, and counting...
Smokers love to loiter or congregate around entrances to buildings, probably because that's where businesses, apartments, resorts, etc. place their ash trays. Why can't they place them 100' away from the entrances?
This is my problem, but I'm getting fed up with the fact that I'm dealing with an issue that is an existential threat to my life. I'm not in danger of being infected by someone with a contagious virus that may or may not make me sick or kill me. I'm in danger of immediate DEATH! I'm not being forced to drive to another state to exercise some form of bodily autonomy. That option doesn't exist for me at all. I'm not bothered by someone getting my name wrong, or using the wrong pronoun, or discriminating against me. I don't really have an identity that can be offended anymore.
It's like I'm invisible to the world. Nobody sees me. I'm effectively already dead, but the dead have this way of intruding into the world of the living sometimes, and I'm about to go Medieval on this whole God-forsaken world. I may be on the verge of making it everyone else's problem.
I've politely asked people not to smoke near the entrances of buildings only to be summarily disregarded, smirked or laughed at. Perhaps one of those Super Soaker water cannons might be the remedy I'm looking for. This one looks good:
http://www.isoaker.com/Armoury/Analysis/1998/super_soaker_cps3000.php
Smoking never used to bother me, and I've never been one to tell people how they should live their lives, but I may actually be the only one in over seven billion people on this planet that have this problem so perhaps I may need to enlist the help of people who just simply don't like smokers. Perhaps they may just need to know that there is actually one person on this planet that is at risk of immediate death to secondhand smoke to motivate them to go on the offensive.
I realize that soaking a smoker with a water cannon may result in retaliation, perhaps even sever bodily harm. A Super Soaker 3000 isn't a threat to anyone's life, nor is it even likely to do physical harm to anyone. Therefore, if they approach me with intent to do bodily harm, I am probably well within my rights to defend myself with pepper spray, mace, and/or a taser if necessary.
Who's with me?